On the person…

17 June, 2009 at 11:05 am (Various)

I am a pessimist, its true, no need to hide it. I’ve been tru far too many troubles to believe still to the fairy tale of the nice good world and happy life. But this is not valid for me only, unfortunately the general situation is this one. There is an old tale that says the world is a wheel and turns around, but like a wheel with a weight, it tends to stay down longer than it stays up.My idea on peoples is neutral, I do not believe there is evil, but only absence of good. I do not believe people are evil in their deep inside, they are no evil as no evil is the tiger that kills and eats the baby impala. Many of the “evil” people are just unable to feel the other person, when they do something hurtful to someone, they do not even thinking they are making the person feel bad. Is it evil only a sort of ignorance of the other side feeling?

I’ve talked with persons who are considered the most evil, and so far, I have found the reasons they are like that, they have been so hurted, so beaten up, that they completely turned in themselves closing their soul from all the outside influences. Not being able to listen anymore, they are unable to feel when they are hurting someone. They hear only their voice, and nothing else can reach them.

Its said their character became this way, but I don’t believe in character, for me, the character is a fictional mask created by ourselves to protect our inner being, like a lobster we use that hard shell to protect our soft inside. Some characters are thick like a wall, and some are thin and transparent, the harder the better? I don’t think so, the harder the less likely the person is able to listen.

Its simply useless to close ourselves inside an hard shell, by separating ourselves from the surrounding we surely protect our inside from all the threats and blows which will come, but we will also lock out all the good things. I’ve been spending on resilience, trying to build resilience to the max. Resilience, the capacity of a substance to absorb blows in the elastic range, recovering the damage immediately and (almost) completely. Life will bring many severe blows to our inner being, and some of them will be powerful enough to pass the “character” shell and hit directly, and hard shell will protect from many blows, but once broken is very hard to reconstruct, in short, is not possible to hide from life. Soon or later blows will come, and in that moment, resilence is what will help. Being able to recover is not easy, the natural way is to hide and avoid the blows, but is impossible in the long term, unless living in a monastery or such; recover is possible, and no matter what, its always better.

I do not feel afraid anymore of getting blows, since hidden behind every blow there could be an open hand, I have chosen to risk. 99 times I get hurt, and have to recover, but there is always the hope that the blow turns into an open hand.

But everyone is different, and everyone choses his path, since i don’t believe in an universal truth, there is no way I say my approach is more correct, everyone choses what suits best, I hope after a good and deep understanding and awareness of his inner nature. I am very strickt about trust instead, since i don’t believe in a separation between past, present and future, but in a flow, I tend to give ppl far too much trust, and sometime they lose it, well, once they lose it, its very unlikely I will grant again, unless I feel the person is very different.

It’s really a wrong way? Maybe yes, maybe not, each one can choose the side he likes. I do not “categorize” persons, or better, I do in a flowing way: a person is who he is only in this moment: i.e. today someone is a sad person, doesn’t mean that he will be sad forever, I believe we slowly change all the time, by the interaction with other persons, so if I don’t see a friend from very long time, I might be well surprised of how much he has changed when I see him again!!!

So why all this partial discussion on persons? Sometime a writing is just a writing, there is no other purpose than the writing itself. So today I wanted to write this, and I did, if someone wants to read this far, he should also know that not everything is rational, and we do have a dark side who is partially unknown even to ourselves…


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